A submissives journey |
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Chapter
1
Chapter
2
Chapter
3
Chapter
4
Chapter 5
Chapter
6
Chapter 7
Chapter
8
Chapter 9
Chapter
10
Chapter
11
Chapter
12
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"Orgasm Control/Release Training"By gina
My Master and i
practice Orgasm Control which is also known as Release Training.
It is NOT the same thing as Orgasm Denial which both my Master and i do
no feel is healthy. We have an agreement that i will never go
longer than one month without having an orgasm. Usually i don't go
any longer than a week or so at a time. When i met my Master and He
explained to me that Orgasm control was His kink – i looked far and wide for
information on it and found only a couple of articles and nothing at
all written by a submissive. That is what made me decide to write this
article. Orgasm control is
something that i totally enjoy. I enjoy it so much that i have to admit
that it is now MY kink! It began simply enough. Master asked me one day
if i wanted to 'try something' for Him. i was at work and said 'yes
Sir'. He asked me to go to the ladies room and stimulate myself to
the point where i wanted to have an Orgasm - i was then to stop and not cum.
When i got home in 4 hours i could go to the shower and bring myself to
orgasm. i shrugged and said sure. i did as He asked and the
afternoon passed with some pleasant squirming and thoughts of the
shower i had been promised. By the time i was driving home, i could
think of nothing else. My body was on fire and as soon as i got in
through the door i went right to the shower and had a wonderful orgasm. "When can we do this
again Master?" was my next question. Little did i know! A subbie should
always be careful what he or she asks for! That night Master asked that
i give Him my orgasms. By agreement i would not have an
Orgasm without
His permission. Being a new subbie and craving control as i did, i
was happy to make that promise. So from then on, when
we played, Master would tell me 'not yet gina’ and 'don't you dare cum
gina'. Finally after much physical teasing, He would tell me to
cum for Him. Although i have always been highly sexual and never had an
issue with orgasms in the past i found that each
orgasm i had using orgasm
control was the best i had ever had! i loved orgasm control at that point!.
Each session ended with my having an orgasm and i was having more
orgasms than
ever before! Even though i was 43
years old at that point, i learned about my body with my Master. He
taught me not to think about the orgasm that i might not get but to
enjoy the arousal. Prior to His training i had always been concentrating
on the expected orgasm and not the feelings that came before the
release. i am not sure i could have even told you before what those
feelings were like. i was fixated on the release. i was such a good
student! Once i became comfortable with all that had been taught to me
until this point, i was then assigned to do exercises every day where i
would kneel and insert a light weight vibrator. This cannot be done with
a heavy vibe! It was reinforced over and over again that the exercises
were not for my pleasure - they are something i do for my Master.
i would then hold the vibrator which was turned on low at the beginning
for short periods of time - beginning with just 5 minutes. i would
squeeze my muscles around the vibe to hold it in. It was almost like
doing kegels, only harder. i was not to cum during exercises! i
was to stop before i got to that point. And then start again when i
could. This was not to exceed one hour. Master was very clear with His
expectations. Some days i could do it and other days i couldn't. never
was i made to feel like a failed though.
Master gave me lots of reassurances and praise during this time. Once i was able to
hold the vibrator for 5 minutes on low a few times in a row - Master
increased the speed of the vibrator each time that i got to the point
where i was successful for a few times in a row. Finally when the
vibe was turned on high and i could hold it for 5 minutes; He brought it
back to low and increased the time - building it back up again each time
i reached success at one level. i do these every morning. It is
one of our rituals. At that point i was
still allowed to touch whenever i wanted. Little did i know what a
privilege this was! For about a month Master practiced physically
stimulating me and then denying my orgasm - until finally He let me cum.
Each time He would let me cum but only after i had waited for longer and
longer periods of time. Then He began to do the physical
stimulation and not let me cum! Orgasm control was not so much fun
then! i was told i was no longer allowed to touch. My toys were
off limits and the toy box kept locked. Master had begun to take
control of my physical reactions to His teasing. He began to build
trust that He would not push me past what i could physically handle.
He watched me very closely during this time. He then taught me to
have small orgasms. i was to only allow my body to have a gentle
release. i would tightly clench my muscles and try to hold back
the orgasm. Over and over again He reinforced small orgasms with me.
He could tell me to have a small orgasm and i would be able to have just a
gentle one or He could tell me to explode and i would - after physical
stimulation. This was practiced
time and time again until He could control what intensity of orgasm my
body had in reaction to the physical stimulation He provided.
Again, each success was celebrated and each time it didn’t work i was
encouraged to try again and praised for all i gave to Him. i was
never punished for a mistake. i found it was very
hard not to touch. Even today not touching is the most difficult
part of orgasm control for me! We discussed this when i first realized
how hard it was gong to be for me. i asked Master for His help and a
punishment was agreed upon if this rule was broken. Master would remind
me daily of what my rules were and how He expected they would be
followed. i found myself leaving showers, hurrying to change
clothes, and being quite irritable. This only lasted for a short
time though. For me it was the hardest period of orgasm control
training. For sure it was the most frustrating.
We spent a lot of
time practicing up and down. "Up" meant that through physical
stimulation i would be on the brink of an orgasm and would hold it.
"Down" would mean that i was on the brink of an orgasm and i was to deny the
feelings and bring myself back down off the edge of the orgasm. We
moved from up and down through physical stimulation to up and down
though voice control with no stimulation. Then Master had a
wicked thought. He decided if He could control the intensity of my
orgasms He would also like to get me to cum but also tell me to stop in
the middle. He used His most 'Domliest' voice to command me to
stop. Master usually makes requests and is very polite. This
was direct order time! It worked and He
could get me to stop in mid orgasm. i hated down and i hated
stopping but i also loved the fact that He could do this with me.
It is very important to point out at this point that this was something
we were doing together, not something that Master did to me. For
awhile when He would make me stop and i was successful, i was allowed to
cum afterwards. Finally He moved to the point where He would tell
me to stop mid-orgasm and i was not allowed to cum at all. Next He would give me
an assignment that had me going someplace nice and quiet. i had a
favorite place where i would go and be alone by the side of a stream on
my property but it could have been anywhere that i was comfortable. The
point was that i was alone and not right there to hear His voice. He would then have me
practice going up for Him. And then come down. Or He would have me go
somewhere and then go up and have an orgasm - big or little as He desired.
Then we decided together that my orgasms were for His pleasure and
therefore i would only have them when we are together as He reinforced
that my orgasms were for His pleasure and not mine. Orgasm control is not
something you can rush through! It is something that is
done slowly and built upon, one
step at a time. At this point we had been working on it for about
a year. Then one day Master told me to 'cum for Him'. No
physical stimulation, no talking me up - just CUM. And do it now!!!! It worked!. My body
responded to His order. i was shocked. The orgasm was different
from any i had had before. It came from inside me; not from anything
that was being done to my body or my mind. He ordered and my body obeyed
Him. The first time it
happened i was scared to death! It is very frightening to realize that
someone has control of your body - even when you want them to. The
fact that He could do that to me (or with me) made me stop and think
really hard about what i was giving to Him and why. This period took a
lot of talking. Master spent a lot of time reassuring me and did not
push His new ability. He gave me time to get used to the idea of
this brand new control He had over me. After lots of talking and
reassurances; i relaxed again and it was on to the next level.
Then came the day
that we were in the middle of an argument. i was not too pleased with
Him at that point. Suddenly He orders: "gina, cum for me now".
My mind thought -"yeah right" and then i felt my body start to respond.
i began to have an orgasm even though i was so angry at Him i did not
want to have that reaction! This really
reinforced with me that it was His. i belonged to Him now - it
really felt that way. Even when i was upset and not feeling the
least bit horny; He could change that with one request. My body
seems to hover on the edge of orgasm a lot now. Again He gave me time to
get used to this idea before He moved on. At this point, i went
to my mentor with a fear. We had been working so long on orgasm control
and now Master could make me cum on command - would He now get bored
with me? Was this the end? We had reached the big GOAL so
what happens now? Both my mentor and my Master reassured me that
this was just the beginning of our growth together and not an ending
point. And that was correct.
Master and i are still learning and growing together. Only
now we have something that no one else shares with us. Sure i can
get stimulated from lots of things: pictures, a good hot story, touching, etc
but only Master can make me cum on command. From that point there
has still be more to learn. When Master commands me to cum now i
do - immediately. And i don't stop. The orgasms just keep
coming, one after another. Even when it hurts, until He tells me
to stop. And while i am sure that i could take control and stop
myself from cumming before i died from exhaustion – it doesn’t feel that
way. The feeling of
control is immense. For a subbie that is a joy like no other.
i feel i truly belong to my Master now and have given Him a true gift.
i hang on His every word; waiting for that command to cum for Him and
then waiting for the one to stop. There is no other way to explain
it. Orgasm control is a
behavioral modification. i have been taught that i am to react
one way or another depending on His command. Time, patience,
support and lots of love have brought my body to the point where Master
can trigger the response that He wants from it. It was all done
with positive reinforcement and very little punishment unless I
deliberately broke the rules. And it was built up slowly and
patiently. i have heard many who
have stated that orgasm control is abusive and that it is a type of brain
washing. i have heard that it changes the subbie in not so
positive ways. While i can understand how this type of power might
be abused - as any power might be - for me it has been a very
pleasurable and rewarding experience. i have not changed in
any way other than in the way my body responds to my Master, in the
intensity of my orgasms, in the level of control Master has over me and
in my self confidence. Sharing something so intimate with my Master and
being successful at it has given me a sense of pride as a subbie that i
had not experienced before. Orgasm control or
release training is not for everyone. It is something to be tried and
then used or discarded depending on the results that are forthcoming and
the reactions that the Dominant and submissive are looking for. It is not worth
breaking a relationship up over. It cannot be forced and for some people
may not be possible to achieve. Orgasm control is my
kink. It is my kink because i find a peace and completeness in it that i
have not found elsewhere. Emotionally i enjoy the control that my Master
has over my mind and body. Physically i enjoy the best orgasms of
my life. Orgasm control provides both myself and my Master with a lot
of joy.
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