An Essay on Subspace
A submissives journey
Probably the toughest thing
to describe to the uninitiated is that elusive thing that many
call "subspace." It's also known as "headspace" or "flying" or
"floating" but while those of us who are experienced know just
what this means within our own context, it is a very difficult
thing to define. In fact, I've been trying to write about it for
a number of years now without success.
Okay, why is this so hard to pin down? Because it is felt differently by any given individual and there are many ways to get to this point; there are also some folks who never feel much of anything mentally but may feel certain physical responses.
At this point, I read my own words on the subject with a great sigh. I've just written two whole paragraphs and haven't said anything worthwhile. But, like any other topic in this lifestyle, there is no *one true way* to describe any relationship or the feelings anyone experiences as a part of this lifestyle. So, I speak for myself here and *Your Mileage May Vary* as they say. One of the few things I can state in an absolute way is that it is my Master (Michael) who coined the term several years ago and he *borrowed* the term from Star Trek.
Subspace is--usually--more than just the submissive headspace one feels from serving one's dominant in some way... more than that extraordinary need to please that is so common for slaves and submissives alike. The most simple description is a sort of hypnotic state reached by the release of endorphins into the bloodstream. But the pseudo-scientific explanation of subspace doesn't really matter, at least as far as this writing goes. What I want to talk about is the mental and physical feelings involved.
It can take on a dreamy quality and can virtually paralyze some submissives for a time. It is, in my opinion, also the greatest natural high there is and many have likened it to a "runner's high" or the release of adrenelin into the system. Some have said it is invigorating rather than a relaxing trance-like state and it has often been stated (I think mostly by those who have never experienced it) that it is only possible to reach subspace through painful physical stimuli. Frankly, that is nonsense; it is more than possible to reach subspace from overwhelming passion and love with no pain being involved at all.
I've felt subspace on a number of levels in my time in the lifestyle, which, by the way doesn't make me any sort of expert on the subject. There are many submissives I have spoken with who feel wholly different in this mental state and all of us are describing the same thing.
Sometimes, subspace can get so deep that one can't communicate at all and can't even move. I've had this happen a number of times and it is for this reason that I want to caution folks who are new to all of this that no matter how subspace is felt by any submissive, this can be a very dangerous situation for both dominant and submissive. After all, if the sub cannot communicate, he or she cannot safeword, safe "gesture" or in any way protect themselves and it is up to the dominant to handle such situations with a level head and to be aware of it. My point also covers the fact that subspace can change over the course of a relationship and the reactions--even to the same stimuli--can also change for no particular reason.
Subspace can be the most wonderful experience and it can also be terrifying. I've also felt as if I were falling out of control and this is not a pleasant feeling. I am not describing a *flashback* situation from some previous situation going badly (such as abuse issues), but rather a sensation that is like being in a plummeting out-of-control elevator. I can be talked *down* from this, but have been fortunate to be with a Master who is always prepared to handle whatever form my subspace may take in any situation.
At its very best, subspace is almost always a mental and physical *high* for me. I sometimes see my own body in a beautiful garden with gorgeous flowers and a flowing stream and feel such a sense of security and comfort and love that I can only describe it as *temporary Heaven.* Often, I do not speak at all but I know my Master is there and it feels as if we are the only two people in the world. Sometimes I do talk, but not in response to my Master but rather a flowing sort of stream-of-consciousness that makes no sense really. And when he brings me *back to earth* from these kind of subspace experiences, all of my physical discomforts are gone and I feel no pain whatsoever. I feel as if I could run a marathon and this is what is magical about it. I do suffer from constant pain in the form of inflammatory arthritis and there is no medicine in the world that works to totally alleviate my pain as *subspace* does for a period of time.
Beyond this wonderful high is the essential complete trust I have in my Master. I know he will not leave me alone in this state (which could be quite dangerous) and that unless there is some emergency, he will be gentle and take his time bringing me back from the subspace to reality again.
I have had subspace last for several days as well and that is sometimes an almost bizarre feeling. Bizarre because the things that normally bother me don't bug me at all and I feel quite *dreamy* even while able to function as I usually do; I'll call these experiences a sort of *veiled reality* and I have no idea why subspace varies so much from time to time. Also, I have gotten into subspace with just his voice on the phone and from multiple orgasms as well. Altogether, it is a state of mind and sometimes state of body that I wish could be bottled but I have not *mastered* getting into subspace all by myself, though I suppose that may be possible as well.
This Dominant submissive/slave lifestyle website first became active on about February 1, 2002. The Asj community has been online in one form or another, including computer bulletin boards since approximately early 1985.