Tips on Being a Good Submissive

Tips on Being a Good Submissive

Deciding to enter a relationship with a dominant is a decision that should not be taken lightly. You may have no doubt that you are a submissive personality, but that does not mean that you will automatically be a good submissive. Being a good submissive involves a certain mindset as well as the ability to discipline yourself. Here are some tips for being the kind of submissive that any dominant would be proud to call his own.

1) Pick a good dominant.

 

This will be your 1st and possibly the most important decision you will make upon deciding to embark upon a submissive lifestyle. This decision is ultimately yours. Nobody can force you into submission. You must go willingly, so choose your dominant wisely. No submissive will ever be better than the one she chooses to be her dominant.

2) Know your limits.

Think long and hard about what your limitations are physically, mentally, spiritually and emotionally. Write them down and share them with your dominant. It is very important to share these with him before you decide to enter into such a relationship. Your limitations can make or break a relationship, and it is important to be upfront about them in the beginning.

3) Submitting means you truly give your all.

This is something that many submissives fail to realize. Many believe it means giving only what you want to give or feel like giving. This is not true, though. True submission means going above and beyond...giving until it hurts. It does not mean giving all of yourself physically and then holding back the rest. A good dominant will want to know all about you...inside and out. Your feelings will be of the utmost importance to him. By giving your all, you will be enabling him with the tools he will need to be a good dominant in your life.

4) You do not have to be perfect.

Many submissives believe that unless they submit perfectly all of the time, they will not be appreciated by their dominants. The truth of the matter is that many dominants actually enjoy a submissive who is a bit bratty from time to time, because it gives him a perfect opportunity to put his power moves into play. Just as he enjoys this feeling of taking things and getting them back in control, so does the submissive. When a dominant shows his power, it makes her feel safe and loved.

5) Be open with your dominant.

Do not be afraid to share you innermost thoughts and feelings. He wants to know. If you try and hide your feelings from him, he will eventually find out. If nothing else he will find out through little resentments that can build up. If you have a fear or are uncertain about something in the relationship, it is much better to bring it out so that the two of you can discuss it and come to a resolution.

6) Say goodbye to jealousy.

When you decide enter into a dominant submissive relationship, you must learn to say goodbye to outward expressions of jealousy. Nothing can kill such a relationship faster. Your dominant may decide to have more than one submissive. If this is the case, you must learn to deal with it and realize that his relationship with another submissive does not take away from his relationship with you. A good dominant is able to separate his submissives and see the beauty and value in each one. If you think jealousy is a potential problem in a relationship, discuss it before you commit to one another. It could very well be that you need to seek another dominant.

7) Obey your dominant.

Nothing tells a dominant you care more than this. Obeying him tells him that you are willing to do anything for him.

8) Realize that a dominant/submissive relationship is not just about sex.

It is about control. Many such relationships involve no sex at all. Many are much more service oriented. This is a good thing to discuss before you decide to enter the relationship. Make sure it is the kind of dominant/submissive relationship that you are seeking.

9) Respect your dominant.

One thing that most dominants will not tolerate is disrespect. No matter what the issue, you must always approach your dominant in a respectful manner and tone. It is fine to disagree or question something, but do it with respect.

Being a submissive can be difficult, but it can also be very rewarding. By following these steps you will ensure that you are being the best submissive that your dominant will ever desire.

 

Did you know, the Asj Community hosts �Dominant submissive and BDSM Lifestyle Classes and Discussions� here online every Sunday evening at 9:00 pm Eastern Time.  The Classes and Discussions are open to all and Free to attend.  Visit our Members Only Pages for more information, or click any of our �Member/Visitor Support� icons to ask for more information.

 

 

 

 

This Dominant submissive/slave lifestyle website first became active on about February 1, 2002.  The Asj community has been online in one form or another, including bulletin boards since approximately early 1985.

 

 

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Revised: September 10, 2019