Common Sense in BDSM

1. Never play if you have been drinking alcohol. It dulls the senses and impairs judgment.

2. Never play with someone you don't feel completely safe with - trust your instincts. "No" is an acceptable answer. If NO is not respected, neither are you. Stop immediately and leave.

3. Agree on safe words before playing. Common words are "yellow, " meaning you're approaching your limit, and "red" means stop. If safewords aren't respected, then you aren't either. Stop immediately and leave.

4. The top is responsible for monitoring the bottom's condition. If there are skin ruptures or bruising, it's time to stop no matter what the bottom thinks or wants. Stop play and tend to the condition immediately.

5. Never strike above the tailbone. Kidneys and the base of the spine are easily injured.

6. Never test a "new toy" on a partner. Test it on a pillow or your hand first until you have command of it. And never be a test subject. Control and proficiency should be demonstrated to prevent injury.

7. If there is "wrapping," either change position or the toy. Or take a break - wrapping can come from leaning when the top is growing tired. Some toys tend to wrap more than others - throw those away.

8. If you bind wrists or ankles, there should be enough room to slip a finger in. Watch for any evidence of the fingers or toes turning bluish. Unfasten immediately.

 9. Tops are not automatically Doms, nor are Doms automatically Tops. Bottoms are not automatically subs, nor are subs automatically bottoms. One is more mental and the other more physical. Avoid disappointment by choosing the right kind of partner.

10. Use common sense. It's called "play" for a reason.