A submissives journey

What's new 

       on Asj?

 

 

Chapter 1
The Asj Community

 


 

Chapter 2
Resource Information 

 

 

 

 

Chapter 3
Subbie's Couch


 

 

Chapter 4
The Dom's Lounge

 


 

Chapter 5

 The Library

 

 

 

 

 

Chapter 6
BDSM

 

 

 

 

Chapter 7

 Useful Links

 

 

 

 

 

Chapter 8
Members share their thoughts

 

 

 

 

Chapter 9

 Members Only

 

 

 

 

 

Chapter 10
Asj's Site Index

 

 

 

Chapter 11
Asj's Book Store

 

 

 

Chapter 12
Recommended Reading List

 

 

Chapter 13
Asj slave, sub Registry

 

 

 

 

 

 


 

 

 

 

 

Facts about B&D, D&S, and S&M

 

Mutual consent is what distinguishes BDSM from abuse and assault, just as consent distinguishes sex from rape.

Context is what determines whether or not pain is experienced as pleasurable, though the context depends on the individual.  An example of "good" pain may be getting scratched during sex, while an example of "bad" pain may be stubbing your toe.

Some individuals view BDSM as their sexual orientation, like heterosexuality, homosexuality, and bisexuality.  Others view it as a chosen sexual practice.  In either case, it needs to be respected.

Not all BDSM play is between heterosexual couples.  People who practice BDSM may be either monogamous or polyamourous.

BDSM may or may not include sexual contact.  For example, during a "scene" which centers around the use of flogggers the partners may not have physical contact which goes beyond friendly hugging, yet to each individual, the scene may be sexually arousing.  This sexual energy may be used at the end of a  "scene" either with that partner, another partner, or by the individual alone.

People who are submissive with their partner in a BDSM "scene" may not be necessarily submissive in other aspects of their lives.

BDSM can encompass physical and/or psychological interactions.  Ligature marks around wrists or ankles cause safety questions to be raised.  War patients about erotic asphyxiation -- choking play or hanging play is very dangerous but common.

Accidents can happen n BDSM, just as in any other physical activity, but this isn't abuse.

Rings, collars, brands, piercings or tattoos can be symbols of commitment which are as sacred as marriage bands.

Both "tops" and "bottoms" can have bruises or soreness from a play session (scene).  Both "tops" and "bottoms,"  regardless of their sex, can be abused.

Not all women "sub/bottom" and not all men "Dom/top."

Some people are proud of their bruises marks/cuts just as they might be proud of a hickey on their neck.  Don't assume it is a problem or a mistake.

Partners who know each other very well may sometimes "negotiate" a scene without a "safe word" -- this is still not abuse but a matter of profound trust.

 

 

  

Temporary Consensual Agreement

 

 

Temporary Consensual Master Contract

 

 

Negotiated Boundaries Contract for the Enslavement Term

 

This Indenture

 

Slave Contract

 

Master & Slave Contract

 

 

 

 

 

Questions about our site?  Click the Member/Visitor Online Support icon to chat live or leave a message with our site host.  CJ isn't always available, but generally you can find Him here from about 8:30 - 11:00 pm Eastern time. Your questions about the site, the Asj community or just about the lifestyle in general are always welcome.  If nothing else, take a moment and tell us what you think of this feature!  

 

 

Live Chat Help

 

 

 

Join Alt.com - largest BDSM/Alternative Lifestyle Personals!

 

 

Excellent books for those in the lifestyle,,,

 

 

                                          

 

 

 

 

Can't find what you're looking for? 

Try entering a few keywords in our site search engine. (enter your search words in the light green shaded area)

 

 

 

 

 

Copyright 2002 - 2012 [A submissives journey]. All rights reserved.
Revised: July 10, 2012